Glider Love

So, I'm in the VFW Thrift store because my friend Ron told me about a glider bench he'd seen there.
I love glider chairs & benches. I have a glider chair from the 50's & a bench that has seen better days.  Anyway, I'm looking for the bench and this elderly Hispanic man strikes up a conversation with me. Nothing special, just talking.
He then asks me if I had a husband.
What!??
Steve's death is too fresh & on my mind so I'm just not on guard yet.
I tell him (the old guy) that my husband had just died.
That's when it gets weird.  Okay, weirder.
The old guy asks me if I'd like to go out & have a drink sometime.
OMG, Steve's barely gone and I'm getting hit on in a thrift store.  Is this where my life is headed?
I tell him I'm just not ready to go out yet and probably won't for a while.
This old guy is tenacious and wants to know how he can find me when I'm ready to DATE.
Again, OMG... Seriously!
Still in my grief stricken fog I'm able to come up with an answer that he can except.
I come into the thrift store a lot...
It was the best I could do.
The old guy left.  Most likely to go find his wife and grandchildren in another part of the store.
After all this weirdness, the glider bench was gone.

Life without Steve

Life without Steve...
Last Tuesday my Steve died.
Not being medical professionals, when the doctors told us this was serious, we both were like " yeah, we get that ... So when do you think he'll be able to go home?"
Why keep putting him thru dialysis every day if he was doomed?
He was moved back to ICU late Sunday night.
Around 5 am Monday morning I called his night nurse, she told me she'd been a nurse for over 32 years and tried to be honest with families.  Steve's health was dire.  Very bad.  Not good.
The doctors were pumping serious antibiotics, 100 percent O2 and propaval to keep him sleeping.  So back to not being a medical professional...
Steve always brought up the fact that I had been pre-Med in college (for about 2 seconds) and I would repeat the fact that I'd only gotten thru freshman biology which consisted of horrible worms that can live in the human body! He'd say "you were pre-med" and I'd say "Worms".
But NO ONE was clear enough, early enough.  By the time the ER doctor told me they could bring him back each time he coded but he wouldn't make it thru the day, I still wasn't grasping what he was saying.  So I asked " are you saying Steve will NOT get better?" The ER doctor said "he will not". Doctors must think non-medical people are mentally challenged. But, in my limited pre-med experience (worms) if they knew this, why had they kept pumping him with drugs?
So I asked them to let him go.  Please don't put him thru any more heroic gestures.
It was terribly quick, maybe 15 minutes.
My sweet, grumpy, smart, courageous husband is gone.
I hate that I feel this way but what am I going to do without him?
Now it's been the calls to friends who let's just say, are not taking his passing well.
Steve was just the kind of person who was so solid & had your back always.
The thought of him not being in this world is just incomprehensible.